It's stunning to witness the bizarre array of interpretations people have of "doing the right thing". See: http://www.johnlovas.com/2014/04/exclusivism-growing-up.html
If we're fortunate enough to live long enough to achieve some depth of character & wisdom, we shudder remembering how proudly and confidently we thought, spoke and behaved in the past. Humility is earned by making fools of ourselves over and over and over again. We learn to be infinitely grateful to all those who tolerated, and continue to tolerate, our loooong process of growing-up.
"Growing pains" affect not just the maturing individual, but everyone & the whole environment around the person. For better or for worse, we're all thoroughly interwoven, interconnected, interdependent - Thich Nhat Hanh's "interbeing". See: http://www.johnlovas.com/2014/02/locked-in-vs-outside-box.html
So what's the wisest gift to give? Perhaps a sustained sincere, mindful effort to behave as appropriately as possible, nurturing the people and situations around us, and in the process, causing the least possible collateral damage. Perhaps this is how a healthy cell behaves in a healthy organism. This sounds humble, yet it may be the most precious gift we can give.